Beautifully Imperfect Sunflower

I don't understand what's going on right now , I don't know why it's easy for people to hurt me then just walk away w/o any sorry . I wonder why at times they could pretend like nothing happened before . I wonder why can't I just be heartless like them , god damnit luh seriously . Why can't I just be freaking heartless like them . Damn it I feel like giving up already . Damn I need my B , my only honey B who always knows how to cheer me up & console me with her sweet words & warm hug . I need her as much as she needs me everyday . I am sorry , damn I just hate the fact that I can't tell her things like I used to everyday :( . Damn , I miss you so badly . No matter what , you know me the best . My hatred , my love for someone , my deepest secrets.

well maybe to think back everyone has their own problems so I guess I just don't let it out to any soul . Just endure with everything , another dugaan came & I am sure I can go through this .

I just miss her a lot , I even cried for her now days . I just miss being around with someone who truly appreciate me & love me like she does . I miss N too . I miss her hugging me & kissed me when every time we met . I miss you N .

I am just tired . Tired of always putting myself into other people shoes .

Tired of being too forgiving until people take advantage of me & I didn't realize it again -_-

Maybe just maybe it's better to keep it all inside like how I used to . I am tired of sharing cause people keep judging , keep getting hurt too .

now it's just between me & Allah . It's better this way after so much shits that have been going on lately , in the past & currently .

Sunflowy Girl
11:16 AM