Beautifully Imperfect Sunflower

With you , I have learnt a lot of things . With you , I had learnt that even if my so called "enemy" is directly in front of me I must be cool & control myself even I had flashbacks . With you , I feel that everything gonna be okay . Every time I am feeling insecure , you were there to reassured me w/o fail . Till today I believe that you are different from any other guys out there .

With you , I am ready to fall in love again . But with you also I am ready to face the reality .

That our loved ones will not be by our side forever but temporary .

For now I am very thankful to Allah , for giving me this chance to know you , to be friend with you & to love,care for you in a correct way (:

Sunflowy Girl
3:28 AM

NO NO NO , you just made me smiled (:

Sunflowy Girl
3:15 AM

Insyallah , I will (:

Sunflowy Girl
11:48 PM

Plus , I miss my 4SOME-GF's a lot .

Like seriously , I wanna go dating again with nad or nur .

I wanna hanky panky moments again , I wanna be the victim of getting molested . HAHAHA !

More to bully moments luh , always me . LOL xD

Lately , nur is busy with her school projects . Ohh well shaz came back again to her life , I hope for the best for her but at a second thought I want her to move on & be strong like me .

Currently , the other 3 girls are waiting for their results for higher nitec .

I wish you 3 all the best , good luck for your future .

It seems so fast that we growing older each day ..

soon to be a women huh girls ? (;

LAU PA SAT , is STILL ON . Ice - skating too !

Sunflowy Girl
11:34 PM

The thought of starting a new job is scary . It makes me feel so scared , what's more is not in F&B line . It's all about fashion -.- . To be frank I am not good about fashion style but I am willing to learn & ready to try new things . I am not scared in handling with difficult customers , I find it okay for me . One area that need improvement is my stocks taking -__________- . HAHAHA xD

Ohh well while working at FA , I am not interested with stocks taking cause I find it boring . But I guess once I start working this new job ; I really need to put my heart & soul while doing stocks taking .The thought of making new friends ; is scary too . I maybe friendly & easily to interact with unless they're my types . HAHA xD With mats & minahs = HEADACHE . It's not that I look down on them but some times they look down on us ; the simple type of girls & boys .

Brrr ... SCARY !

I wish , I hope that they're friendly like me & hopefully they don't mean NO HARM . Majority of my friends are mats & minahs but they treated me good all this while .

But at the second thought ; I CAN'T WAIT TO START MY NEW JOB !

Finally , I am free from FA hell moments . But I still have to serve my two weeks notice -.-

The exciting part is ; I am gonna wear their branded pants , shirts , skirts & etc .

OMYGODDDDDDDDD ^.^

2 more days to go but my parents is more excited than me .

TSK TSK TSK !

Sunflowy Girl
11:11 PM

Aww.... so cute ! buddy this is for you (:

Every time when you spot a cute baby or any types of babies you'll go like this ;

" hey , awak tengok tu baby tu cute ! "

Thank you for treating me good like a princess . hehe !

Sunflowy Girl
9:35 AM

I expect that I will be in school this year but ohh well something just had to happened this year .

My life would be different starting from monday ohh wait TOMORROW . I don't know should I feel happy or what . But for sure I know I didn't choose this path for myself but for my dearest mom again . To me she's my everything , without her I don't think I can survive till today . I will sacrifice my dream again for her , just her & once everything at least settle down ... I will pursue my dream for sure . For now , I think this is the best decision . I will be learning new things , have a better knowledge in fashion industry , good pay that I think I deserve for now , most importantly that I am willing to learn & do anything for my family sake .

Like finally , I am gonna leave FA . I am half-hearted cause it's so hard for me to leave those beautiful souls there such as ; Kak dayah , nisa , ayu , ashraf , apiz , aeyn & so on . It's too hard to go but then again how long can I endure with all their shits (the upper ranks people) . They are driving me nuts , I have decided to walk away with a positive mindset . Sooner or later one by one will leave FA , it's so sad but it's the fact . It's better to stay away from politics people ! HAHAHA xD . So yeah , I wish all my FA colleagues , all the best . Miss me when I'm gone cause I am extraordinary . I will never forget every moments we had with one another be it short or long , be it sad or happy moments ... Every time when there's a "WAR" everyone will stand by each other that's what I believe in FA esp my sisters !

You three ladies , I already regard & respect you 3 like my own . Be it when there's someone who is unhappy about my pay when I know it's you . I can't believe it at first but I forgave you with a sincere heart . I'll miss you girls the most , it's true . I'll miss designing cookie cakes , talking to the camera & esp my 3 babies at the shop ; MOPBROOMBIN :( . I will miss nisa making fun of me , will miss ayu stories & watching girls together & of course kak dayah ... I WILL MISS HER ! :( I will miss kak dayh stories , she's my listening ear most of the time at work . Haish my life gonna change starting tomorrow .

Wish me luck guys (:

This won't be easy but for now I wanna be selfish & think about my family first but not others .

Sunflowy Girl
8:06 AM

Two is better than one , Buddies Forever (;

Thank you for being here always w/o fail .

Sunflowy Girl
10:44 AM

For sure , I am not gonna ditch you just like that . For sure , I am not gonna let us fall apart .

For sure , I will come to you even though you won't come to my rescue . Always be faithful to one & only be it when I am happy , sad , crazy & simply just being me . But at times I do need you to come to my rescue :'( .

Sunflowy Girl
10:28 AM

& I only wanted what I deserve . At times I just don't know what should my reaction be . I know you can read me so well as if like you're reading a novel . I know you know what I feel but the fact is there's many things that you don't know . Lately talking to allah is billion times better talking to any human being cause Allah will always be here with me , be it sunny or rainy days , be it day or night or when I am gone .

Sunflowy Girl
5:57 AM

Had a great night yesterday cause sakinah slept at my house . Congrats to her for getting into Nitec In Nursing . HAHA future EN (: We talked a lot of things & to my surprised I don't feel awkward with her after so long . I wish I could have more time with her . I miss doing crazy things together , I miss exploring the world with her , I miss those moments when I was just an innocent sab who had only her cousin to lead her into the real world of fun . NOT fun but experiences . I miss those moments a lot . KUTI2 VAVA Family . I miss playing at playground , I miss going to parkway parade & chilled at LJ's , just the four of us . I miss those moments when I was just a student & I don't have anything to worry about but just my studies & CCA :(

But now things changed . Day by day I am changing , changing to a person that I thought I would never be . I can't believe that I've learnt to hate someone , I've learnt that I should not be so nice to others when they treat me bad , I've learnt not to be friend with someone who had let me down when I am badly in need of strength . I am glad that I changed but at the same time I feel bad of hurting my loved ones around me . I am sorry that I could never be the old sab . But for those who really knows me well , you should know that no matter what sab won't never forget where she come from , never forget her loved ones no matter how busy she is , won't forget to stay loyal to everyone & never ever she'll forget the precious one & my nightmare for the rest of my life .

You won't understand me unless you were in my shoes . Yes , I am cheerful most of the times but it's scary to think someone like me go through a lot of shits in her 18 years of living . At times all I wanna do was to run away from everyone but it's IMPOSSIBLE .

cause I am SELF-LESS .

Sunflowy Girl
5:38 AM

today is the 7th . the day that I'll always long for you to be in my arms . Lately things are not going as planned & it feels so complicated . But then life still moved on no matter what . I know I should not said anything about the inside things to anyone but who cares ? From that day onwards when I told him everything , I told myself not to be scared to anyone whether at work or anywhere else & it's time for me to stand up for myself . FINALLY , I am brave enough to shared with him about everything . About what I felt all along . About someone being biased , keep comparing us with other shops , whatever shit that our sales is so pathetic that we don't deserve any respect or some encouragements -.- . Yeah , I told him everything that I know , from A to Z . I am satisfied (:

I told him the truth . So if you think you are not in the wrong , why should you be scared of him asking you some questions ? HAHAHA xD for now I am free from him . She said ; I am asking for trouble . I laughed anyway .. I didn't ask for any trouble , I am just finding some justice for us the part-timers . This is not about wining the debate competition or what so ever , it's about being fair to every each individuals ( your part-timers & full-timers ) .

For now , everything seems quiet . Plus I have changed , that's a good thing . Now , I don;t need buddy to teach me how to bitch back to someone like her . Now , I can stand up for myself . HAPPY ! (:

Sunflowy Girl
10:32 AM

Sunflowy Girl
10:44 AM

Hey beautiful soul , I miss you every time when we're busy with our own things but I am thankful that at the end of each day you're still there waiting for me . Thank you for everything , the little things that you've done for me & so on . You're my buddy my awesome great buddy-love (:

Love , S .

Sunflowy Girl
10:29 PM

ANOTHER DAY TO REMEMBER ; BFF L.O.V.E

6 years & still counting (:

Day 1 ; Meeting point was at nad's house as usual . Nur was late super late cause she is still deciding whether wanna escape from her dad or not -.- . So the four of us is so excited to the max , the moment we stepped into our room we all are so happy & look at the bed it looks so comfy to sleep in .

After settling down & performed our prayers we just relaxed in the room mean while wawa met her boyfriend . Left 3 of us , we are so excited to start the Barbeque at 5 pm but our excitement can't wait any longer so we decided to go cheers & bought ices & some foods to filled our empty stomach first . Bbq started at 3 pm ended at 1 am in the morning . Mind you we're still not tired at all . Nad's Family came over so as shimah & her boyfriend & nur guy friend . Basically day 1 is not that happening compared to day 2 when someone came up with evil ideas .

" BATAL AIR SEMBAYANG AKU , ALL THANKS TO MAD-DAMN " (;

First day nur & wawa was on the phone non-stop . Haiya the main reason of having this gathering was to enjoy & for awhile to let go of your boyfriends . Haish they failed to do so as they're loving their other half too much . HAHA ! till someone pissed off huh (;

But I am the only solo one on that night . hehe FREE LIKE A BRID ! xD

Day 2 ; I woke up at 7 am in the morning , feeling so cramp cause I slept in the middle of the four of them . Purposely move here & there so that the rest will wake up too . haha yeah I am mean at this part . so 1 hour later wawa woke up followed by nur . The moment when nur woke up she told me that she was HUNGRY ! -.- wth early in the morning she's hungry already . I sayang her to the max so I sacrificed my sleep just to do for her noodles in cup . We went to the beach with our smelly face & chilled over there . It's feel so peaceful (:

After all that chit chats we went back to our room & guess what ? I fall asleep again & I was the last one to woke up . We woke up around 2 I guess so . HAHA ! Wawa boyfriend joined us for lunch at Magic Wok after that we headed back to our room while wawa went dating .

It's raining outside so we decided to chilled inside after 2 hours of waiting for the rain to stopped we went cycling for 1 hour after that continue with our Barbeque & Nad's Family came over just to help us finished our foods (:

Wawa went to bed very early except the four of us . We took our bath at 1 plus in the morning , showered with cold water . Brrrr ... & after that we're feeling hungry again so decided to eat those tidbits we bought . We watched a movie & played with nur webcam .

& do some evil things . Around 4 am in the morning everyone dozed off .

Day 3 ; We all feeling so half-hearted to leave the place cause we're not done having fun without our parents . Checked out at ; 11 am . Headed to tamp & had our lunch at Macs . Talked about our secondary school memories got us into laughters to the max. Around 1 we went to our separated ways except me & nur . She needed my help with her project .

so yeah this is what best friends are for , help one another .

I hope our friendship last till anak cucu Ladies !

Next trip ; Pulau Ubin & JB (:

♥ Sabby

Sunflowy Girl
10:30 PM

2011 is here but I still feel the same . The feelings is still lingers around me every single day & one day I hope I'll learn to love you . I celebrated new year by working full shift . Great (:

On the eve of new year I ended work early , headed home straight & spend my time with beloved mom watching fireworks at Tv . Mom said that only christians went down town just to celebrate new year -.- cause muslims new year arrived before actual new year . Indeed it's true but it's nothing wrong if you just wanna see fireworks right ? but this year is different no fireworks for me .

Went to sleep early than usual , unexpected but maybe I am just too tired of the world then my mind rather take a nap .

I ended my 2010 in a very awesome memorable ways . Like spending 3 days 2 nights with my favorite best friends ever at KL shit . haha ! In singapore -.- . I tell you , they're awesome even like cooooooooool awesome . W/o them I don't think I know the meaning of True Friendship . Like seriously . So yeah 2011 will be a fresh start for me , as a student . Insyallah (:

Sunflowy Girl
9:24 PM