Beautifully Imperfect Sunflower

I have a friend . We were once very close . But after awhile we drifted apart as we both are busy with our own life. When I saw you online , my heart beats started beating very fast. Then you sent a nudge to me . We started chatting like we used to , we cracked jokes like there's no tomorrow & you make me smiled :)

I know life is sort of hard for you but don't worry I'll be here for you , as a friend.
People change for a reason , not really actually full of reasons.I know it's hard for you to see changes in her when all you want is for her to stay the same. It's crazy when you wanna let go , you keep holding on , but when you want to move on but you're stuck at where you started. And it's weird how feelings come & go and you can't decide what you want. And you have so many things to say but you don't know where to start. sucks right ? I know how it feels .

So here's my promise to you; we will go through this rocky road together.
I'll be your listening ear & if you need a shoulder to lean or cry on , you can lean & cry on mine.
But listen , don't you give up if there's still a room for improvement right dude ?
I hope you know what's the best for you , well I just don't want her to hurt you .But the bottom line of all this heartache & whatever nonsense right :
Don't waste your time being sad , because you're wasting away moments in which you could be happy :)

It's weird , It's funny , It's crazy : when you told me you miss hanging out with me & asked me out. But I know what you really want , you just wanna release your stress & you want me to cheer you up. Seriously , I feel that at least someone showed it to me that I am important in their life. I hope you would cheer me up tooeeyy .
Meet up soon :)

Labels: This post is for you nameless guy ;)

Sunflowy Girl
8:23 PM

Don't take people around you for granted .
A love that is pure & true comes once in a lifetime.
The ones that comes later will never mean as much.
If you let it go , you may regret it your whole life .

CHERISH , before it go away .
Anytime , anywhere everyone die & I wonder when is my turn?

Sunflowy Girl
11:31 PM

TRUST.FAITH.BELIEVE.>PEACE.LOVE.HAPPINESS

Right from the start I don't believe in forever anymore but you came by & told me forever exist . The actual fact is forever don't exist but only to those people who believe in it. Well , I don't believe forever exist anymore . I don't want to be hurt later on but I do believe that my feelings are true & it exist forever.

Girls will be your friends, they will act like it anyway. But some come & some go.
The ones that stay with you through everything , they're your true best friends. Don't let them go . As for lovers they come & go too .. And I hate to say it , most of them actually pretty much all of them is going to break your heart , make you cry like there's no tomorrow.
But you can't give up because if you give up , you'll never find your soul mate.

As for me now , I'll think later about the soul mate topic as I myself is pretty unsure about that. But I do believe that love is beautiful thing & hate is a part of love . I do have faith&trust in my relationship with him. I know that I will be there for him no matter what.
Like regardless of how mean he will be , how smelly his fart will be, how disgusting his vomit will be , how broke he will be & so on . I know you have changed , you change on your own free will. I can't deny the fact that I hate you changed but I have yet to learn & discover about the new you . The more I learn about you , The more I love . You may forget what we've gone through in the past , but I don't . As if like those memories just happened to me again. When flashbacks starts I can only depend on myself now . Not you or even my girls.
Don't take things for granted . Every patience has their own limits . Every heartbreaks their own endings too. Every happiness don't have ending because you,yourself has a choice whether to be happy or not :)
Right now , I want to focus more in what I really want to do . about my future & career .
I want to find my passion back . I really want but without you & all in it . I want to make the right choice without their opinions & all . It's time to be on my own now on making the right decision.

I don't want to depend on you to make me happy.
I want to be happy on my own accord.
I want to have fun but without sins.
I want to do the right things too.
I have never give up on you.
But I promise you , I'll guide you if you can't guide me anymore
as I truly love you ....

Labels: :)

Sunflowy Girl
10:21 PM

With every moment we share, every smile, every touch, I become more certain that in you, I’ve found something I’ve looked for a very long time. I don’t know what the future holds, but I do know how much your love excites me and how happy I feel when I’m with you. And, from this day forward, that’s more than enough."

Believe me that you deserve me , like no other . Because I believe I deserve to have you since we're friends , lovers - opps & etc . Thank you (!)

Labels: :)

Sunflowy Girl
7:56 AM

not to forget something , thanks ashraf for replacing me for tmrw & next sunday :D
I owe you two days . haha ! I thank allah for giving me such lovely & understanding friends at work ! Life is hard , but no matter what makcik sabby kena SENYUM :D hahaha !

Labels: :D

Sunflowy Girl
7:14 PM

I miss being free from everything . I miss doing the things that I love . I just hate christmas season but I love christmas by the way . I may look happy & laughed alot but actually I am not.
I hate my work schedule for this coming week , not fair we all(the part-timers) can't choose which day to work . All they say is we all must try to bear with all the works & busy-ness . Lucky for me on christmas day , is my off day .

Good Luck my brother & sisters loves at work on christmas (!)
I wish I could meet the "real" santa claus ! & ask for everything that I could . I seriously need a break from work . Damn I so wanna enjoy myself , I so wanna go shopping with zanna ! I miss her , I miss RUSYAI-DINA love . I wanna meet my girlfriends & be crazy with them . I wanna meet love , I so wanna meet him ! ugh .

But then I have to wait until end of this month . After I get my pay & after my work schedule is back to normal . yay let's wait for that day ! & I so can't wait to see my cousin sakinah .
She will be back in my life . yay yay ! I heard she has changed for the better . Like finally :)
Let's hang out like we used to & kuti-kuti vava family need a reunion !

toodles !

Sunflowy Girl
6:54 PM

Happiest girls are the prettiest girls right ashraf ?
like Sabrina , Ayu , Azura , Nurul + Nisa :D

IM BACK.

There are moments in life that make you , moments in life that breaks you.

There are moments that influence you, and moments in life that change you.

There are moments in life that chanllenge you and moments in life that inspire you.
There are moments in life that crush you and moments in life that destroy you.
There are moments in life of total peace and there are moments in life of total chaos.
Nothing is permanent , everything is temporary .

WORK: I <3 my job . working for famous amos is awesome . I love all my work friends . Whenever one of us are feeling down there's always someone or all to cheer us up. Ashraf is kental but he is kind & a good guy(eh please muka sememek jangan kembang).Thank you for sending me home everytime dude. Ayu is downtoearth girl . She love to laughed , that spongebob laughters ! haha . Nisa is like a sister to me . Damn I can talk to her openly about anything especially talking about rolling & shaping the dough . haha ! Nurul she is a cheerful girl & we love to chanllenge each other when it comes to dropping the dough & shape it. IMISSNURUL ! Azura is cute & friendly, she reminds me of my cousin sakinah . All my supervisors are kind to all of us :) Right now is christmas season so yeah I'll be so busy till the end of this month . I am gonna work more days till the end of this month after that I want to work less .. I need my holidays too . I don't mind working everyday cause my workplace is fun , cus we don't really bitch about each other expect one maybe.( sab tak nak masuk campur) :D
overall : I CAN'T STOP FALLING IN LOVE WITH MY JOB !
The pay maybe little but I don't care , as long as I am happy at work .

Love Life: Nothing much to elaborate . Well he is having his holidays now but as usual Mr.Busy man will always be busy. I am not complaining or what but sweetheart its the fact. Actually I don't really spend much of my time with him nowdays . Since he is busy with so many school events & his aunty engagement preparations. Too busy that he forget about our diary . Forgot to blog about us. Forget to read my daily tumblr , damn I need to remind him at times.
eeee! geram . We're okay now , just that we don't get to see each other that often. By the way don't hide things from me ... cus if I find out the truth , I don't know what will happen next.
I have faith in us & trust in you don't ever take it for granted. I really love you & I hope we could spend more time as I really miss you so much ! damn it .

Girlfriends: Salwa is away , she is at myannmar for a school trip. Nadrah is sick now & free like a bird ..So yeah more outings for her . Shop here & there till she drop dead or pokai. Get well soon girlfriend.Nabilah is a happy girl ! Happy uh get to see her "boy bakar" whenever she wants to & she is jobless. Nurrahaan , I bet everyday she just rotting at home doing on the phone 24/7 , eat , sleep & etc SHAZ (!) & yeah she is jobless too. I told you both already in retail line is hard to get a job , Food & beverage is the easiest way out . At times the pay is quite attractive :)

Well , IMISSGIRLFRIENDS ALOT (!) we will go for a breakfast date together , I'll be the planner . yay so girls just wait for a text message from me . wee !

- that's all for now -

Labels: livelifelove :D

Sunflowy Girl
6:38 AM

SAYANG , I NEVER FORGET THE DATE & YOU (!)
HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY ABU/BEAR/CUTIE.
MUACKS :)

I called myself lucky .Im lucky to be attached. Im lucky to have a beutifully imperfect family . Im lucky to such lovely , awesome , understanding girlfriends (!) At times I wonder , why my girlfriends are not so rich , smart , materialistic , crazy over guys in a blink & etc .. like yours. I found the answer deep down my heart. My girlfriends may not be rich and they all ITE students but one thing I care so much is that they are the ones who keep me going through good & bad times since secondary & also primary school.They don't crazy over guys in a blink expect one of them . Im so lucky. We've alot in commons in relationship , fashion , feelings , situation when there's crisis(pokai) , family probs & esp we LOVE to look at pretty girls. By looking at pretty girls dosen't mean we're lesbian or interested in them . It din't mean anything PEOPLE . Don't ever judge a book by it's cover , it's better if you look yourself in the mirror & ask yourself wether you are so perfect that you can look down on others first. We may be ITE students but we're smart in our own ways , being retarded in our unique ways , being sensitive in our almost own ways too , being such a cry baby in our MOST UNIQUE KECOHRABLE ways ^_^ & we love each other equally the same expect for the TWO . hah ! you know I know . I really LOVE my girlfriends for life . Eventhough I make new friends at work , in school or outside NO ONE can replace them. not even ONE . cus they so precious & mean alot to me (!) I always need them every single & part of them . They are my real true friends . The real friends is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out .

ps; I have a surprises for you'all . kalau satu dapat semua dapat yer . tapi for abu will be different uh. hahaha ! :D

Labels: im lucky to the max to have 1 2 3 4 girlfriends .

Sunflowy Girl
5:17 PM

I wish I was rich so that I can have my own apartment & my girlfriends can come & stay whenever they want to. haha what a dream ! one day , I'll be rich & fat !
FATS=LOVE , I love myself that's why Im not FAT now but only BONCIT . maybe in the future 40years later I'll be fat or skinny to the max .
just being random , bahaa !
I MISS MY FAMOUS AMOS FRIENDS ! & I HATE HAAGEN-DAZS .

still owe me & nadrah $$$$$ :(

Labels: bahaaaa

Sunflowy Girl
9:27 PM

*everyday when i go to school i wish that i will be able to see you. when i do, i wish that you will smile at me. after that, i come home and wish that you will be online. and when you are, i wish that you will talk to me . sigh , it happened fyi . but then it was in the past about me&him . The past is the past now I HAVE YOU . Sweetheart thank you for trusting in me & my love . I just wanna you to be in my present & future forever & ever . My love for you is strong than ever .
Eventhough its unofficial , I do take it seriously as we've our witnesses surrounding us :)

Labels: Im happy to have you ..

Sunflowy Girl
10:09 AM

I have a new job , I work as a . . . oh FAMOUS AMOUS CREW (part-time only) .
I bake & I eat cookies alot .
I make alot of new friends such as ; Ayu , Azura , Ashraf , Nurul , Nisa , Leah , Wendy & Chirfang . not to forget Shirley .
They all are the best !

Eventho at times ashraf maybe abit irratating , his sillyness & muka boring tu still make me smiled .Eventho azura is a sensitive person , I still want to be her friend.
Eventho Ayu has a unique laughter , I love being around her.
Eventho nurul is not happy with her current someone I hope one day I could change her mind.
Eventho chirfang talked alot , I love hearing her voice . Without her voice , the outlet seems so quiet & boring.
Leah , wendy & shirley, they love to jokes around & smile & I love them .

Thank you ashraf , for calling me pendek . Im not okay ? :) thank you for the post at your tumblr. so sweet of you .. & thank you too for seeing me home . haha bodyguard-ku !

WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR RIGHT ?

Labels: :) For Famous amos peeps only .

Sunflowy Girl
8:50 AM

"Men hate to cry, they rarely ever do. But when a man cries over you, you know he loves you. Because men only cry when they lost something or are afraid of losing something that they love as much or more than themselves. "

three row straight of my posts just for you , only you .
thank you too for crying since last year till now . hahaha !
Im so mean , I guess . *winkwink* enough posts for you , the rest is at tumblr so blur sweetheart.

I.LOVE.YOU TTM

Labels: :)

Sunflowy Girl
7:41 AM

{ I thank you if you read this too .... }

Thank you. Thank you for remembering the smallest little details about me to prove to me that I’m worth knowing. Thank you for never giving up on me, and instead standing even closer to me every time I changed my mind about things. It proves a lot. Thank you for caring so much about me, so genuinely. Thank you for all the great times you’ve shown me here, so patiently and willingly. Thank you for seeing past my flaws and consistently uplifting my self-esteem, whenever I am insecure. Thank you for loving me and all my negativity that I bring into this relationship. Thank you for putting in more effort than I do to make up after a fight, proving to me that you really do care about me and don’t want to lose me. Every time you do this, I want to cry because I know that sometimes I take you for granted. Thank you for being so giving in this relationship.Thank you for making me a more positive person. Thank you for being so understanding. Thank you for loving me to the fullest. Thank you for your friendship. Knowing you has made my life so much more than it was before, and I’ve learned so much through being with you.

YOU'RE MY WORLD BEST LOVER EVER :)

Labels: Even if they know the truth, they still dont know why I so into you :)

Sunflowy Girl
7:35 AM